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2015年6月13日 星期六

Saturday Fun (星期六趣味)

For many of those actively engaged in honing the skills and training up the mind and morals of our children, with all those additional administrative work invented by educational bureaucrats for their own convenience and which have now been unfairly dumped on to the shoulders of our overworked teachers saddled with large classes,  teaching may have become an almost unbearable burden. But it needn't be that all the time. There could be fun in teaching too. 

1.

Teacher: ‘Craig, you know you can't sleep in my class.'
Craig: 'I know. But maybe if you were just a little quieter, I could.'




2.

Stressing the importance of a good vocabulary, the teacher told her young charges, "Use a word ten times, and it shall be yours for life."
From somewhere in the back of the room, came a small male voice chanting, "Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda."



3.

Pupil: I don't think I deserved zero on this test!
Teacher: I agree, but that's the lowest mark I could give you!



4.

What do you call a teacher without students?
Happy...Wait, Broke…oh wait again, that’s a regular teacher



5.

Teacher: I want you to tell me the longest sentence you can think of
Pupil: Life imprisonment!



6.

Kindergarten teacher: Why have you got cotton wool in your ears, do you have an infection?
Pupil: Well you keep saying that things go in one ear and out the other so I am trying to keep them it all in!


7.

Kid comes home from 1st day at school.
Mum asks, 'What did you learn today?'
Kid replies, 'Not enough. I have to go back tomorrow.'

8.

Pupil: Teacher, would you punish me for something I didn't do?
Teacher: Of course not
Pupil: Good, because I didn't do my homework


9.

Teacher: You copied from Fred's exam paper didn't you ?
Pupil: How did you know ?
Teacher: Fred's paper says "I don't know" and you have put "Me, neither"!


10.

The little boy wasn't getting good marks in school.
One day he made the teacher quite surprised. He tapped her on the shoulder and said ..."I don't want to scare you, but my daddy says if I don't get better grades, somebody is going to get a spanking."

Have a nice weekend!

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