More jokes on/for would be philosophers (準哲學家的笑話)

If a smile, a chuckle or a guffaw should make an appearance on your face reading any of the following, give your thanks to fellow blogger Ms Bear at Lib. But for her, you wouldn't be reading anything! Have fun with the philosophers or would be philosophers.


1.

Descartes takes his date, Jeanne, to a posh restaurant for her birthday.

The sommelier hands them the wine list, and Jeanne asks to order the most expensive bottle on the list.

"I think not!" exclaims an indignant Descartes, and "POOF!" , he vanishes into thin air.
 

2.

When Plato first met Socrates:

"Socrates, why don't you ever have a girlfriend?"

"Plato, you ask too many questions."

 

3.

A philosopher had a driver who would listen in awe to him whenever the philosopher answered difficult questions about the nature of things and the meaning of life.

One day the driver asked the philosopher if he was willing to switch places for just one evening. To his surprise, the philosopher agreed.

When the time came for questions, someone at the back of the room asked him, "Is the epistemological meta-narrative that you seem to espouse compatible with a teleological account of the universe?"

"Oh, that's such a simple question," he replied. "So simple, in fact, that even my driver could answer it."

 

4.

Question: How many Marxists does it take to change a lightbulb?

Answer: None. The lightbulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.

 

5.

Upon waking, a woman said to her philosophic husband, "I just dreamt that you gave me a pearl necklace. What do you think it means?"

The man smiled and kissed his wife. "You'll know tonight," he softly whispered.

That evening, the man came home with a small package which he gave to his wife.

She jumped up and embraced him, and then settled on the couch to slowly and delicately unwrap the package.

It contained a book entitled, 'The Meaning of Dreams'.

 

6.

Five Zen monks are meditating in a monastery when, all of a sudden, the prayer flag on the roof starts flapping.

The youngest monk comes out of his meditation and says, "The flag is flapping."

The second, more experienced monk, there for about a decade, says, "The wind is flapping."  

The third monk, there for about twenty years, says, "The mind is flapping."  

The fourth monk, the  second eldest who has been there for some thirty years says, "Mouths are flapping!"

The fifth monk, the eldest and most experienced who has been there for some forty years, asks, "What flag, what wind, what mind, what mouth, what flapping?"


Have a nice weekend, rain or shine.