Saturday Fun

Before you know it, it's Saturday again. Whether or not there are stock market crashes around the world, time for a little fun. If you want fun, nothing better than to have women around.  So, here they are!

                                   1

Three women are about to be executed.

The first is a brunette, the second, a redhead, and the third a blonde.

Two guards bring the brunette forward. The executioner asks if she has any last requests.

She says, "No" The executioner shouts, "Ready . . . Aim . . ."

Suddenly the brunette yells, "Earthquake!!!"

Everyone is startled. In the confusion, she manages to escape.

The angry guards then bring the redhead forward. The executioner asks her if she has any last requests.

She says, "No". The executioner shouts, "Ready . . . Aim . . ."

Before they're done, she screams, "Tornado!!"

Again,  there was a momentary confusion. She too manages to escape.

There was a smile on the blonde's face. She had figured out everything.

The guards bring her forward. The executioner repeats his question.

She also says, "No". The executioner shouts, "Ready . . . Aim . . ."

The blonde then shouts, "Fire!!!"


                                   2


A blonde and a redhead went to the bar after work for a drink.

They sat on stools watching the 6 o'clock news. A man was shown threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge, and the blonde bet the redhead $50 that he wouldn't jump.

Sure enough, he jumped. So the blonde gave the redhead $50.

The redhead said, "I can't take this, you're my friend."

But the blonde insisted saying, "No. A bet's a bet."

Then the redhead said, "Listen, I have to tell you that I saw this on the 5 o'clock news, so I can't take your money."

The blonde replied, "Well, so did I, but I didn't think he would jump again!"

                                  3

A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs.

One night he's doing a show in a small club in a small town in Arkansas.

With his dummy on his knee, he's going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting: "I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person. Because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against, not only blondes, but women in general...and all in the name of humor!"

The ventriloquist is embarrassed and begins to apologize.

Then the blonde yells, "You stay out of this, mister! I'm talking to that little jerk on your knee!"

Have a fun filled weekend!