Saturday Fun

Relationships can be a real source of joy. Not only that, it often comes with some free add ons. Hence they can be the source of endless fun.

1. FOOLING AROUND

A middle-aged couple that had two stunningly beautiful teen-aged daughters but no son, decided to try one last time for that son they always wanted. After months of trying, the wife became pregnant and sure enough, nine months later delivered a healthy baby boy.
The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new son.
He took one look and was horrified to see the ugliest child he had ever seen.
He went to his wife and said that there was no way that he could be the father of that child. "Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered."
Then he gave her a stern look and asked, "Have you been fooling around behind my back?"
The wife smiled sweetly and said, "Not this time."

2.  DARK SECRETS

A boy was told by a classmate that most adults have at least one dark secret and that this makes it so easy to get some needed cash simply by giving their parents a knowing look, saying "I know all about it" and then smiling.
The boy goes home, give his mother a knowing look and says, "I know all about it" and smiles.
His  mother quickly hands him a $50 note and says, "Just don't tell your father. "
Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth" with a knowing look and a smile. He got another $50 and a whisper not to tell his mom.
Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day, when he sees the mailman at his front door.
The boy greets him by giving him a knowing look and saying, "I know the whole truth" and smiles.
The mailman drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, "Then come give your FATHER a big hug."

3. A CHRISTMAS WISH

 An elderly couple was celebrating Christmas at home when a fairy appeared.
The fairy told them that since it was Christmas, she would grant them a wish each.
The wife said, "I’ve lived for so many years, but I've never seen the beautiful Swiss Alps. I wish we could travel there."
The fairy waved her wand and SWOOSH! She had a pair of return tickets to Switzerland in her hand.
Surprised at what he saw, the husband became excited and started racking his brain for a wish.
He ruminated for a moment, and then said, "I am envious of those guys who have young wives. If possible, I want to be married to a woman who is 20 years younger than me."
The fairy waved her wand and SWOOSH!
He became 20 years older.

4. THE TRUTH

Johnny had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months yet Jenny stayed by his bedside every single day.
When he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer.
As she sat by him, he said, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started to get worse, you were still by my side. When I think about it now. ....I think you bring me bad luck!"

5. MARRIAGE 

    Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is a husband.

    Marriages are made in heaven. But so also are thunder and lightning.  

    Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

    It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss.

    Married life can be very frustrating.
    In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.
    In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.
    In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.

    When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or his wife.

6. LOTTERY

    A woman rushed home from work and exclaimed to her husband, "Pack your bags, I've won the lottery!"
    The husband excitedly asks, "Should I pack clothes for cold or warm weather?"
    She says, "Pack'em all, you're leaving!"

7. A WISHING WELL

 A couple came upon a wishing well.
The wife leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny.
The husband decided to make a wish too but he leaned over too much, fell into the well and drowned.
The wife was stunned for a moment but then smiled, "It really works!"

   
8. ONLY ONE WIFE

   Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a good cook.
   But the law allows only one wife.

   
9. A FINISHED MAN

   A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.

10.     SOUND MARITAL ADVICE

          If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.

Have a wonderful and relaxing weekend.