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2010年11月20日 星期六

Two Ladies in Heaven

When I woke up this morning, the first thing which met my eyes was a clear blue sky. It felt good. Then when the thought that it was already Saturday occurred to me, it felt even better because as a fellow blogger reminded me, it's time to relax. And to joke a little. So here is a relaxing conversation overheard by some angels in heaven.


lst Woman:    Hi! My name is Lydia.


2nd Woman:  Hi! I'm Sylvia. How come you're here?


lst Woman:     I froze to death.


2nd Woman:   How horrible!


lst Woman:      Wasn't so bad. After I stopped trembling from from the cold, I felt sleepy and then I passed out. What about you?


2nd Woman:    I died of a massive heart attack. You see, I suspected that my husband was fooling around with some chick or other, so I came home early hoping to catch him in the act. But I found him all alone in the den watching TV.


lst Woman:        So what happened?


2nd Woman:      I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere. So I started running all over the place to find out. I ran up to the attic and down the basement.  I went through every closet and checked under every bed and I moved everything which could be moved. But I still couldn't find her! I got so frustrated and angry and exhausted that my heart could take it no more. So here I am.


lst Woman:          Too bad you didn't look in the freezer. We'd both still be alive!


9 則留言:

  1. elzorro 星期六真係冇甩拖笑話陸續有來呢
    [版主回覆11/21/2010 00:37:00]Glad you enjoy it! Have a nice weekend! You fully recovered?

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  2. Good jokes! I almost laugh to die ... " Freezing ladies in the freezer,     Ladies defending their love status in deep heat,      In anger and in fury,       The burning moment of  love in hell,         Freezer freezes the highlights of flammable love affair...!"  Good evening, my dear old friend ! 











    [版主回覆11/21/2010 00:42:00]Can the freezer freeze passion, jealousy, anger, despair?  Whether or not it can, I certainly like the Eagles. Thanks for the music video! Have a relaxing and productive weekend!

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  3. Ha ~ ha ~~
    No one wants himself or herself froze to death ...
    Love always drives most people crazy la ~~
     
    [版主回覆11/21/2010 00:44:00]Yes, love is really a crazy emotion. But we all enjoy such craziness! We find such craziness absolutely fascinating. We can never have enough of such craziness!

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  4. Life itself is including the unknown crazy and mysterious elements ~
    Who can catch the wind ?  Who can fly to the moon? Can we dip into the sea without any support? so on so on ... What do you think ...
    Enjoy your beautiful  holiday
    [版主回覆11/21/2010 06:52:00]Love is a very complex emotion and life is even more complex. Love is numerous tiny hopes and disappointments, separation, longing and constant togetherness, caring and being cared for, union and loneliness a deux. desire for possession and desire for freedom ....Life is even more complicated. It is everything: knowledge and ignorance, revelation and mystery, self and others, self and the world, it's quantum physics, Newtonian physics, chemistry, biology, physiology, psychology, economy, politics and metaphysics, planning and unplannable destiny, beauty and ugliness, good and evil, truths and lies all crazily mixed together so that there is madness in reason and reason in madness. But as the Buddha and Sartre said, in the final analysis, it is both being and nothingness. It's both tragedy and comedy. But above all, it's a big joke, often at our expense!
    Thank you for your good wishes. I will try to make myself happy.

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  5. Thanks for your Saturday joke.  Mine has just been posted in my blog.
    [版主回覆11/21/2010 08:41:00]They're hilarious. Thank you so much!

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  6. Have a nice sunday !
    Nice to meet your blog !
    [版主回覆11/21/2010 15:26:00]Thanks for visiting. Please be forewarned though. You may find it a more attractive proposition counting the number of times your favourite pop star use "swear" words in public because it may put you to sleep in 30 seconds flat! I only serve jokes Saturdays!

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  7. Yes, as u said, Life is more complicated...
    But whenever there is love, everything can be make possible, and no more complicated !
      when there is love, everyone could have smiles even in silence alone! when there is love, everyone could have peace in their minds even in silence alone! when there is love, everyone would not be afraid of any curses on them!
    [版主回覆11/21/2010 15:13:00]

    It may be more accurate to say that when we think/feel that there is love, everything you say "appears" subjectively so. Whether in "fact" they are so, only time will tell. But all those in love feel that what they think "must" be true. How could they be wrong! The feeling is so strong. When they are not, they feel "disappointed" "cheated" "betrayed" and blame their "fate" or their faithless "lover" or their competitor whom they call the "intruder", the "bitch", the "witch" and some other unmentionable names which can be heard freely only in ladies toilets. They cry their heart out. They become depressed. And if they are vindictive, they will do everything within their power to insult, malign, even literally hit or beat up or financially or emotionally wound their ex-lover with the fury of a hurricane. They swear to themselves that they will never allow themselves to be hurt or cheated ever again, until their next dream lover appears, when all of a sudden, all those solemn oaths/resolute promises they made to themselves would somehow vanish, as if their eyes,  bewitched by the same pair of "dreamy romantic" spectacles they thought they had discarded forever, could somehow make them blind again to their former resolutions. They pout their mouths whilst they put on their lip gloss, powder their noses, paint their nails with meticulous care, put on those ravishing false eye-lashes and fuss about what they should wear. They talk for hours on end on the phone to their bosom lady friends seeking confirmation of what they have already decided under the pretext of seeking their "opinion". New hopes, new desires, new dreams sudden revive as if by magic. New longings arise and tiny little dreams begin to stir again within what they thought of a stone-dead heart. Suddenly you hear the sound of "pop" "pop" "pop",  as if they now have pop corn machine instead of a heart. With each new pop, the future looks rosier. Their heart palpitates with excitement and expectation and the butteflies begin to flutter again in their stomache....It's as if the the ice and acid of their former trauma cannot help but evaporate under the soft rays radiating from the tender eyes of their new lover...and the love merry-go-round stirs into action again....

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  8. So well analyzed, even what ladies say in the toilet. I almost thought Elzorror was a girl.
    [版主回覆11/22/2010 09:27:00]You don't suppose ladies would use those words in public! if not, then it can only be in a public ladies toilet where they feel "free". Just elementary logic. One doesn't have to be a girl to know what they may be thinking and just like you don't have to be a dog to know when it's happy or unhappy.
     

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  9. Poor man lost both wife and lover! He must be on his way arriving the next train.
    [版主回覆11/25/2010 00:00:00]Ah! That's women's thinking.
    He's probably having the time of his life! Finally free from two women he knew intimately. All ready to plunge himself into the bosom of still other women without any restraint!
    Women are keepers. Men are hunters!

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