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2013年8月17日 星期六

Saturday Fun (星期六,笑一笑)

We're right in the middle of summer vacation. For most families with children, that means it's travel time. Travel is fun, often in more ways than one.


1,


A Hindu priest, a Rabbi and a lawyer were driving down the road, when the car broke down and it was getting dark.

They were lucky. They found a farmhouse nearby but they got a tiny problem: the farmer told them he only had one extra bedroom and only two twin beds but they were welcome to it. That meant that one of them had to sleep in the barn.

After much discussions, the Hindu volunteered to go to the barn.
A few moments later, there was a knock on the bedroom door.
The Hindu said he could never sleep with a holy cow.

Annoyed, the Rabbi volunteered.
A few moments later, there was another knock on the door.
The Rabbi said there was a pig in the barn and that he could not possibly spend the evening in the barn with the origin of pork.

The lawyer reluctantly went.
A few moments later there was a knock on the door.
It was the cow and the pig!

2.

A tourist is traveling with a guide through one of the thickest jungles in South America. When he comes across an ancient Mayan temple, he is in rapture and starts asking the guide for details.
To this, the guide states that archaeologists are carrying out excavations, and still finding great treasures.
The tourist then queries how old the temple is.
"This temple is 1503 years old", replies the guide.
Impressed at this accurate dating, he inquires as to how he can be so sure.
"Oh, that's easy", replies the guide, "the archaeologists said the temple was 1500 years old. That was three years ago"


3.

Mueller is traveling with his wife and mother-in-law in New Guinea.
At a sacred place, his mother-in-law makes some rude remark to which the natives take great offence.
Mueller is dragged off before the local headman with his wife and mother-in-law and each is to receive 50 cane lashes on the rear end.
But before the execution of the penalty, the headman says that since they are tourists, he'd wish to give them each the courtesy of one last wish.

Mrs. Mueller is first.
"What do you wish for yourself?"
"I would like a pillow bound on my rear end before the lashings."
"Okay, that shall be granted to you."
Mrs. Mueller has the pillow bound to her rear end and receives her punishment. But because the pillow is too small and some lashes land on her back by accident, she receives a few blows.

Next it is Mueller's mother-in-law's turn.
"What do you wish for yourself?"
"I would like a pillow bound on my rear end and a pillow bound on my back before the lashings."
"Okay, that shall be granted to you."
The mother-in-law receives her fifty lashes, but hardly feels any pain through the pillows.

Then comes Mueller himself.
"What do you wish for yourself?"
"Can I have two wishes?"
"Well, first because you are a guest in our country and second, you're the head of the family, your wishes are granted, as long as they are reasonable."
"I would like 100 lashes instead of 50."
The headman is surprised, but recovers again right away and replies, "Yes, that is a pious wish, it shall be granted to you. And what is your second wish?"
"I would like to have my mother-in-law bound to my back without any pillows"


The weather may be foul, but try your best to have some fun. It's weekend!

10 則留言:

  1. 域 流亦詩 Louis Rick2013年8月17日 下午3:41

    謝謝分享幽默輕鬆的文章。祝週末愉快!
    [版主回覆08/18/2013 06:29:25]You're most welcome. You have a nice weekend too!

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  2. like the #1 best. El Zorro, have fun too!
    [版主回覆08/18/2013 06:30:04]Lawyers are seldom liked!

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  3. like the last one the most.
    Have a nice weekend!
    [版主回覆08/18/2013 06:30:43]Poor mother-in-law!

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  4. [版主回覆08/18/2013 06:31:05]Got a problem with her too?

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  5. ¸.•*´¨`*•.¸¸.•*´¨`*•.¸¸.•
    :...(\_(\ ...*...*...*...*...*.
    * .(=' :').* ....HAPPY...*...
    •. (,('')('')¤* SUNDAY!!!
    •....*...*...*...*...*...*...*.
    星期日快樂 Elzorro

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  6. Like the first one. Nobody can stand a lawyer.
    [版主回覆08/18/2013 21:09:49]I wonder why

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  7. The only thing more intimidating than a huge international film star is your mother-in-law.
    [版主回覆08/18/2013 22:26:40]She is often a presence that can only be ignored at one's peril!

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  8. 今後還有人敢說"外母見女婿,口水du du da"嗎.
    [版主回覆08/19/2013 09:02:48]If she can stop giving her "opinions" unless asked!

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  9. I would like 100 gold coins instead of 50 lashes.
    [版主回覆08/19/2013 20:27:09]50 would not be bad already!

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  10. If you loved your wife, then be grateful to your mother-in-law because she gave birth to your wife.
    [版主回覆08/19/2013 20:29:26]Some people just do not know when to call it a day even if it's otherwise good!

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